oh dear god,....
Jun. 24th, 2007 03:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
taleyaanyone else read Short Trips: Farewells? There's one particular story (Life after Queth, by Matt Kimpton), slotted just after Frontios when Tegan and Fivey go to drop off the Gravis.
Of course things go all DW on them, and dear god, the Gravis is making me piss myself....
The Gravis gaped, although in all fairness it would be hard pressed to do anything else. "Execution?" it rasped, the bizarre dangly bits in its mouth rippling outwards in alarm. "You mean...these creatures intend to kill us?" It sounded terrified, which was a bit rich coming from something that had been intending full-scale planetary invasion the day before. It gave a wheezy scream as Plong raised an arm, and inexplicably threw itself to the ground - or at any rate, fell over fairly purposefully - landing face down in the mud with a sad little splatter. It lay there on its belly, scrabbling at the mud with its pathetic flipper paws. Tegan felt faintly embarrased.
PATHETIC FLIPPER PAWS 4TW!
Later it's sulking about "This ground is...cruel. It is dirty and wet and has bits in it" and in a great dig at the production crew, every time it moves IT FALLS OVER. bwahahaha,
The Gravis gave a pensive wobble. "Yes, it is most...fascinating," it wheezed in a voice that wouldn't fool a four-year-old. The Doctor beamed delightedly. "Either we cannot save this planet, or we do not need to do so. So, perhaps...we should return to the TARDIS?"
Tegan felt a reluctant surge of admiration. That was the sort of crass cowardice she could respect. It was almost like having Turlough with them.
And this one is so scarily accurate it's fucking hilarious:
It was an all-too familiar scene. Aliens hellbent on doing something genocidally ill-advised. The Doctor railing against the nearly inevitable. Tegan swept along in the middle of it, following nothing.
"I...do not understand" the Gravis whispered to itself as the argument zipped back and forth.
"Join the club," muttered Tegan, surprised. She could hear the Doctor yelling about science in the background, which was one of his favourite things to do. He seemed to be chiefly concerned with explaining the difference between a cat and a planet, which Tegan hadn't previously considered to be very high up their list of priorities, but she assumed he knew what he was doing.
"Hang on though, I thought you were enjoying working all of this out?" she objected. The woodlouse looked at her like she was mad. It was looking decidedly the worse for wear, she realised; bits of dead leaves stuck to its muddy underbelly, sodden fur clinging wetly to its carapace, and with a definite droop to its antennae. It had never left the safety of its tunnels before, come to think of it. Never been faced with the Doctor's enthusiasm. Never had to avert an apocalypse. "Never mind," she said.
The Doctor was still going off on one about cats. Something to do with this thing of locking them in boxes, apparently, which seemed a thoroughly reprehensible way of carrying on, although he claimed it didn't matter if you didn't look. Tegan couldn't see that one standing up in court.
Of course things go all DW on them, and dear god, the Gravis is making me piss myself....
The Gravis gaped, although in all fairness it would be hard pressed to do anything else. "Execution?" it rasped, the bizarre dangly bits in its mouth rippling outwards in alarm. "You mean...these creatures intend to kill us?" It sounded terrified, which was a bit rich coming from something that had been intending full-scale planetary invasion the day before. It gave a wheezy scream as Plong raised an arm, and inexplicably threw itself to the ground - or at any rate, fell over fairly purposefully - landing face down in the mud with a sad little splatter. It lay there on its belly, scrabbling at the mud with its pathetic flipper paws. Tegan felt faintly embarrased.
PATHETIC FLIPPER PAWS 4TW!
Later it's sulking about "This ground is...cruel. It is dirty and wet and has bits in it" and in a great dig at the production crew, every time it moves IT FALLS OVER. bwahahaha,
The Gravis gave a pensive wobble. "Yes, it is most...fascinating," it wheezed in a voice that wouldn't fool a four-year-old. The Doctor beamed delightedly. "Either we cannot save this planet, or we do not need to do so. So, perhaps...we should return to the TARDIS?"
Tegan felt a reluctant surge of admiration. That was the sort of crass cowardice she could respect. It was almost like having Turlough with them.
And this one is so scarily accurate it's fucking hilarious:
It was an all-too familiar scene. Aliens hellbent on doing something genocidally ill-advised. The Doctor railing against the nearly inevitable. Tegan swept along in the middle of it, following nothing.
"I...do not understand" the Gravis whispered to itself as the argument zipped back and forth.
"Join the club," muttered Tegan, surprised. She could hear the Doctor yelling about science in the background, which was one of his favourite things to do. He seemed to be chiefly concerned with explaining the difference between a cat and a planet, which Tegan hadn't previously considered to be very high up their list of priorities, but she assumed he knew what he was doing.
"Hang on though, I thought you were enjoying working all of this out?" she objected. The woodlouse looked at her like she was mad. It was looking decidedly the worse for wear, she realised; bits of dead leaves stuck to its muddy underbelly, sodden fur clinging wetly to its carapace, and with a definite droop to its antennae. It had never left the safety of its tunnels before, come to think of it. Never been faced with the Doctor's enthusiasm. Never had to avert an apocalypse. "Never mind," she said.
The Doctor was still going off on one about cats. Something to do with this thing of locking them in boxes, apparently, which seemed a thoroughly reprehensible way of carrying on, although he claimed it didn't matter if you didn't look. Tegan couldn't see that one standing up in court.
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no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 05:34 am (UTC)...
...
...
*MUST USE FIVE/GRAVIS ICON OMG*
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Date: 2007-06-24 06:39 am (UTC)Farewells is fucking crack. You have Ian, Barbara and First going on a road trip across route 66 to win the TARDIS back on Ebay after the Doctor lost it gambling again, Fivey trying to get rid of the Gravis, that's complely flipping out...bwahahaa. dear god it's hilarious.
..And slumped in it, half rolled into a ball and making a horrible blarting noise, was the Gravis.
It might have been crying. It might have been going to the toilet. But Tegan was, to her constant irritation, a nice person at heart.
no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 08:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 08:01 am (UTC)In one story, the Master steals a fucking nursing home!
Jesus christ, the crack must be 99% pure over there.
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Date: 2007-06-24 08:43 am (UTC)No, seriously. WHY?
...And which Master? XD
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Date: 2007-06-24 06:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 08:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 09:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 09:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 10:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-26 06:04 am (UTC)*...is thrown back to the 80s*
Oh, Master XD
no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 09:16 am (UTC)That would be
The world is --><-- *this* big.
no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 06:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 11:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-06-24 06:51 pm (UTC)