Brilliant!

[taleya]

I am interested in your product and or service YOU PURPLE-ASSED ANTICHRIST. Please send me THE SEVERED HEAD OF ELMO MUPPET DIPPED IN CORN SYRUP which my mother put on pancakes that are evil cuz nobody never talks about pancakes in the Bible because John was in the Illuminati with Kennedy and DID YOU SEE the YELLOW flowers talking to her?

Yes! maybe no. Yes yes.

Spare change?



I'm going to use that as often as possible in response to nigerian scam emails in my gmail. *nod*

Comments

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

Hello, National Rail Enquiries. Which stations are you travelling to and from, please?

[taleya.livejournal.com]

"National baby selling registry, are you after black, white or asian?"

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

Grantley Mental Asylum, Multiple Personality Ward; to whom are you speaking?

[taleya.livejournal.com]

hnuh hunuh hunuh...what are you wearing?

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

I saw a flower last week. It was nice.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

"Ya wanna sell me wha? Hang on, I'll git gramma."

*hand over mouthpiece*

"GRAMMA! GIT YER BEST DIAPER ON, WE'S GOT COMPANY ON THA PHOOONE"

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

And there were THOUSANDS of them! THOUSANDS of tiny, tiny little blue men all running around shouting "We can't find our hats! Where are our hats?" And then one of them produced a pointy stick and BANG! the sun burst and everybody got knocked over.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

And then....

*trembling tones, sotto voce*

and then...

*leaning in close to the phone and hissing whispers*

Then the saint bernards showed up

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

OMGZ YOU HAVE OFFENDED THE NAZI PANDA

ALL HAIL THE NAZI PANDA

SEE HIS MIGHTY BAMBOO GOOSESTEP

SEE HIS BROWN SHIRT MADE OF BARK

SEE HIM GOING OVER THERE TO TELL HIS MUM

...the world shall never rest easy in their beds again.

[taleya.livejournal.com]

oooh the nazi pandas, nummy nazi pandas, they taste like ladyfingers just like ladyfingers

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

Salt n' Shake makes me happy, momma.

Nurse, the rectal thermometer and a sledgehammer for the man in Bed 27, please...

[taleya.livejournal.com]

You know, next time I get an unsolicited call, I'm just going to read this thread out to them,

[eh-eh-ehh.livejournal.com]

I think it's wise *nods*

[gemnoire.livejournal.com]

Who DARES disturb my dark slumber...

It's a classic but effective